personal development – TRUE NORTH TEAM CONSULTING

The Next Life Chapter: No Pain No Game

Shutting a door with a bang and opening a new one going into 40.

I was embarking on a monumental life chapter on paper. A confluence of factors had me push myself on my New Year’s Resolution going into my turn going “over the hill.” I set out to step up and make it a transformative turn and it sure proved itself as the most difficult, challenging stretch of my life.

Immediately after the Cuba trip in mid-June, I tore the achilles lunging playing pickleball for the first time. It felt like a weight dropped on the back of my leg and I immediately felt a pop, yelled and looked around for someone that kicked me. I’m lucky it didn’t happen before the trip as it well could’ve. Sad moment for a proud athlete who prides himself in skiing 50+ days a year and never getting a real injury to date.

After limping around doing yard work hoping it was maybe a high ankle sprain, icing and sleeping on it hoping the issue would subside, I was proven wrong: this turns into a key metaphor for life and the moment. I woke up, the swelling moved down my league and bruising of the “cankle” was significant. A little Googling had me worried for the worst – a torn achilles. Urgent care got me a quick MRI that I ultimately didn’t need, but it showed a clear rupture. Because I got in early to my doctor, I got the option to not do surgery and just do physical therapy. Doing the research (re-injury rate is 3x less via surgery ) and my father-in-law felt like his ankle came back stronger after surgery and I flipped.

A friend recommended the new “speed bridge” surgery that Aaron Rodgers famously came back from, but that wasn’t readily available locally. I (half) jokingly had my screened and validated OSU grad doctor mark the correct leg to operate on to avoid the accidental procedure on the wrong leg. Luckily the surgery went well, I was wheeled home and fighting the pains trying to minimize the opioids for recovery as much as possible. In short, I’m very thankful for all the help from my father in law Peter, who pushed me to stay on regiment to the exact rep, not put weight on it and helped with chores. I can thank U of Utah’s Dr. Dave Carter (PhD. in achilles recovery), who Peter swore by, Peter and my wife for the support. I hit a flooring low point hope-wise early on knowing my summer and fall were shot, but I was focused on skiing come winter and I sucked it up, worked hard on my PT, hit the weight room hard to build the strength (and then some) and somehow in just under 6 months, worked my way back on the mountain and wrapped up a ski season skiing 54 days and nearly 800k vertical feet. To date, it’s no Rodgers story of non-field heroics, but I’ve just passed a year since surgery (about the date you can said to be recovered) and I’ve had no setbacks aside from sporting a purple, scarred bulge and the humbling life moment escapade that came with it.

A lot of mental work also brought me to forcing myself to step up, realize my needs and what I believe in and take a stand instead of quietly taking the easy way out. Just like hobbling on a leg I knew in my gut was shot and possibly extending the damage and thinking I could “sleep it off,” I had a tendency to internalize. What do I believe in? What breaks the code?

I needed to learn a key lesson when it comes to self-actualization and speak up for what and whom I believe in. Over the course of the year, I transparently called out my closest friends, family and coworkers. I stated my piece instead of allowing the status quo or playing both sides and it led to a ton of pain, heartache and feeling alone with a number of my closest relationships feeling very much in limbo.

I forced myself to start instituting and enforcing boundaries. I’ve realized that you can only control yourself and that people won’t change unless they are open to it. This is a work in progress. The truth is that many of those relationships will never be the same, people come and go and show their true colors. ‘Tis life – stay true.

The world has drastically changed dramatically politically, economically and socially. Many are feeling hopeless and forgotten and it’s easy to get sucked into deep despair following the news: I sure did. It’s ok to not be ok, just know what outlets are available.

While/when it may seem hopeless on a macro scale, it’s okay to tune out and focus on the micro. I just read “Go-Giver” and “Infinite Game” in my summer hammock. I’m a firm believer that karma is real, providing “glimmer” moments – small periods of joy and striving to find ways to give back can help lift spirits. Those can include dropping messages of goodwill, making random people laugh, compliments, gifts, giving time or feedback (transparent) pay dividends in “life purpose equity.”

Give and live! Take stock in what you have with gratitude and not the social comparisons – what a decade and chapter. Stand up for yourself and what you believe in.

You may feel ripped to shreds and alone in the world, but work the process and come out of it a new person; epic comeback story in the making.

Cuba Libre (Reflections from my 2nd Visit)

Cuba is open for business! Yes, still (despite what you may think, Americans). Sadly, since Obama opened the gates to American tourists to come visit again, his successor and even Biden since haven’t helped matters and the new cruise infrastructure that millions was dumped into sits empty and tourist visits have trickled, but that didn’t stop us.

Alli, my wife wasn’t happy that I went to Cuba without her and had been dying to return, this time with close friends of ours known for globe-trotting in Andy and Lisa. We connected in Miami (one of 3 U.S. cities you can enter from), got our tourist visa at the airport for $100, reason for the visit being to support the Cuban people.

After waiting for an extra 25 minutes on the side, while sweating for being overdressed for the tropics, to clear customs (they had some fun with me for a blurry initial photo). Then like that, we were cruising down the scenic seaside Malecon past the occassionally updated ruins to our casa in Habana Vieja.

This trip, we were much more centralized to the action then last time, when we stayed in Central Havana in a busy, noisy neighborhood (still walkable – just much less centralized). Within a 10 minute walk was the waterfront and view of the old fort and all the historic sights of Habana Vieja, tons of bars and restaurants competing for your business via English-speaking street help ($10-15/per gets you an amazing meal with a drink or two and live musicians playing for you). The “real (ie. local) downtown,” Central Havana was also closely connected as was the government center and fancy classic car tours waiting to show you around anywhere for $1.

Highlights were rooftop dining with city and water/fort views and watching a Afro/Cuban parade (orisha / Santeria) with procession dancing by on stilts, having the famous cocktails at the original source of the rum (aged rum tastes like good scotch), mojito and daiquiri with the likes of the statue (and spirit?) of Hemingway, all the food and musicians and the sheer beauty of the old ruins, city parks including a Gaudi Park Guell-like porcelain creation and restored historic grandeur.

Having experienced the vibrancy of Havana nights (and days), I was most excited about the chance to get out of the city and experience the countryside, beaches and towns. Luckily, as part of our 8 day tour, we had 4 nights and an extra day to sightsee across the largest island in the Caribbean. Highlights included: exploring the West Cuba mountains and caves by boat and a special Cuban cigar farm and tour (here’s how they do it), visiting the endangered Cuban Crocs at the Zapata Swampswimming in the legendary reefs around the Bay of Pigs and Fish Cave cenote, learning about the war history around the Bay of Pigs at the Garon Museum (years of civil war of which we unsuccessfully intervened) and popping through the old colorful colonial French town of Cienfuegos.

For this pirate-aficionado, I especially enjoyed the Caribbean town of Trinidad. Trinidad’s ancient streets are cobblestone and labyrinth, to mitigate pirate invasions back when. The history was rich and thick in and around the town square. We were served seafood and cocktails under cabanas on the rustic beach and the town was the birthplace to the famous “Canchancharra” medicinal cocktails (Black Tears rum, honey and a spritz of bubble water and lime). We returned from the beach to an extended rolling blackout, but found our way back to the town square where the owner of a new place recruited us to at the beach, where we found Cuba’s top singing talent (who could sing Adele in Italian, English and Spanish with soul) and a tropical storm around sunset under a roof with mountain, see and town views for many miles. We finished the night watching the tropical sky light up with lightning flashes in the distance from the roof of our place and trying to grab a few winks with no air conditioning.

The mountain pass we went through heading north was scenic and we stopped in a sugar cane factory en route to Santa Clara, where we took in famous communist revolutionary Che Guevarra’s monument while learning more about his contributions in the fight to bring education (he had a doctorate himself) and a reprieve from poverty and indentured servitude to the masses. The Che and revolutionary themes are everywhere in Cuba, despite the fact that he had a falling out with Fidel before he was assassinated in Bolivia.

We concluded our trip in the best possible way – relaxation in the beach peninsula paradise of Veradero off the straights of Florida (Atlantic side). The fine white sand beach was clear and waters crystal blue – much like the Florida panhandle beaches. We stayed a block from the beach, rented cabanas for $1 for the day, refreshed with 80 cent pina coladas and $3 burger lunches, popped by the Beatles Bar, and had nice sunset dinners after driving the strip in a convertible or horse-drawn buggy. It was very relaxing and a worthy Cuban send-off.

Cuba is a very mis-understood place. A friend was jailed for weeks there back in the day for putting up posters promoting a gay party. Beware as there is no extradition. When we asked our guide about facts, the answers were all over the place (ie. unemployment rates) and talking government policy is taboo. Today, it’s unsure of itself and who it wants to be, with a more active black market environment – elements of our market-driven economies and small businesses becoming a lot more accepted, even since the last trip.

True to our visas (which you’re supposed to back with non-government vendor receipts for 5 years), we readily supported musicians and anyone helping make the experience better with $1 or couple hundred pesos, which go oh so long a ways. Occasionally, we got hustled, which entails being led to a restaraunt/bar and overcharged. When the average monthly salary is $30 and doctors make $87, your perspective changes. Monthly rations (including “Vitamin R” and tobacco) are covered for all, as is housing, employment and medical (Cuba has one of highest doctor to citizen ratios and treatment levels).

Cuban industry has shrunk considerably (many people ask for medical and US logo/city products as they are scarce and expensive). Tourism has taken a major hit and all the hotels and resorts are government owned. Despite everything, life is simple, the reefs are still pristine, food (always get the pork) and drinks are as fresh and tasty as they come and the people are smiling, happy and full of soul and charm.

I recently read Humankind: A Hopeful History by Rutger Bregman (no surprise that it was written by a Dutchman). The premise is that society co-existed and thrived when sharing and started coming a part once individual possessions started to become a theme. There are some very evident, exponentially scary flaws to capitalism and clearly communism is a flawed ideology that far from achieves its means.

While I nurse my surgically repaired achilles of which I’m on the hook for thousands and dealing with the stress of all the missed agenda items and months-upon-months of recovery ahead, it’s hard to not think of the the different world-view such an injury brings about for someone in a place like Cuba!

Revolutionary!?

First the Bomb Drop. Then the Reconciliation.

2020 was the year of all years where every sign of the apocalypse showed up at the doorstep.

In the isolated island that is Utah, not only did we have the devastation of the ongoing pandemic, but an earthquake with powerful tremors reverberating for weeks, a hurricane-like windstorm uprooting many massive hundred year old trees, political and social justice turmoil, armed militia-presence and progress denial and since, killer wildfires and avalanches.

It took the public police execution of George Floyd and countless others caught and shared on social media to collectively start forcing awareness and change on the law enforcement and social fronts.

It’s forced us all to be real about what we truly believe and who we are instead of hiding it in the shadows.

The sports and entertainment world is traditionally the great melting pot where even political and social differences could be overcome by collectively rooting for the home team. However, organizations were largely not forced to choose sides and bigotry and hostility often swept under the carpet and left to fester. Until 2020.

With that, longstanding oppressive actions of controlling elites have become exposed. Notably, two of the sports organizations I had been involved with came under fire and investigation for racism, sexism, bullying and abhorrent cultures created under the old guards. Scrappy local reporters and brave former employees stuck their necks out and via social media spurned “Me Too” movements that caught so much traction that they could not be denied. Feel free to read into the Washington Football Club and Real Salt Lake sagas independently as there is plenty there from countless employees and fans.

The precedent is shifting and it’s no longer an acceptable practice to abusively get away with being bigoted, self-centered, controlling tyrants.

There are consequences to pay because transparency is here to stay.

While the gap has widened considerably between the haves-and-have nots, through this mess of a year, change is happening and the messages of the slighted are now being surfaced, and in some cases recognized and even prioritized. There are no easy fixes and change takes time.

Purpose and character – where do you stand? Individuals and companies were all put on the spot transparently. If you’re hiding in the shadows, you’re considered guilty. If you don’t come off authentically, you get called on it.

There’s too much on the line: lives, jobs, daily, travel, norms, environmental sustainability, and family routines.

Real change has taken place and there’s no going back from here.

It’s a new era – Derek Chauvin, the police officer that infamously killed George Floyd on camera has been convicted and not let off the hook.

Now, as we continue climbing out of the hole with the mass 2021 vaccine rollout, issue prioritization and economic recovery, lessons have been learned and there’s no going back.

What happens when the lights go off? … Time will tell.

Global Reckoning Period – Adapt or Die II

It’s like a bad sequel. Groundhog Day: Return of Ned Flanderson (sans Bill Murray).

Just when you thought we were turning the corner to stop the gore and the killer had disappeared, we stumble, trip and allow for the villain to catch back up.

We have now entered into the eye of the storm. It’s quiet. Too quiet. And peaceful. But just you wait.

Experts and past leaders knew a pandemic was well within the cards. Luckily, we were prepped for past threats in SARS and Ebola. When the world watched China and Europe get decimation, we hesitated, thumbed our nose and got crushed.

Instead of a World War II-like rallying behind our leaders and mission, our Fake News fragmentation and direction for states to figure it out independently kicked in.

Sadly, the fact that it’s a crucial election year and prospects of a depression took precedence over public health and getting mass testing and herd immunity to where it needs to be.

“Liberation” of our freedoms, opening up non-essential businesses and protesting from close distance is the obvious death trap. Just ask John from Ohio. Oh wait…

No, we won’t save ourselves from UV light or drinking bleach. Please don’t try it (although do go outside – sunshine helps your mental psyche, although it won’t defend much against viruses).

The U.S. (and much of the world similarly) has now far eclipsed the quickest unemployment rate drop. Time and decisions made by all of us will tell whether we eclipse the peak rate of 24.9% during the Great Depression. Hopefully those affected will learn valuable new skills and trades in the meantime while growing relationships at home to evolve and come out of this stronger.

The economy is vital to us all, but we have to trust the scientific experts and the math (see Domo’s live trend visuals). A few weeks of apprehensive business openings isn’t going to be worth the collateral damage we face by being premature and negligent.

Chances are, many more of us have had it than we know. We need mass testing and antibody testing to tell us that as and we still don’t understand what level of exposure (if possible at all) we need to have had to mitigate the threat of a second mutated bout.

We’re working feverishly to enable a vaccine but best case scenario to get one is by almost all accounts is a year from now – around April 2021. Then it has to be mass distributed to the public.

Life as we knew it in terms of going to the flights, concerts, games, bars and restaurants we so loved won’t be the same. We’ll have to adapt to the new normal, even after the vaccine.

We are seeing heroes and valiant, selfless acts happen all around us. It’s the medical, grocery, delivery workers and average Joes going to get groceries for their elderly neighbors that are making the difference and deserve to benefit when the dust settles.

If we’ve learned anything through this, it’s the danger of not educating and equipping the poor and ignorant. If we don’t give everyone access to accurate information, health care and the means to work and live, everything else is threatened. Billionaire Mark Cuban (story of past encounters with him to come) has been a voice of reason for the people, making a public play for trickle-up vs. trickle-down economics.

Maybe we will swallow our pride and step up together when it counts.

Regardless, the shark will be stalking the shores and connected rivers beneath the surface.

Global Reckoning Period – Adapt or Die

Speaking of stalled aspirational progress, as we are all now acutely aware of, the global economy hit a screeching halt by way of a COVID-19 (Coronavirus) pandemic.

Ramifications and the related coverable topics are endless.

A globalized reckoning, which was anticipated to happen at some point by the experts, caught us all on our heels and we couldn’t react quickly enough to put it to bed before massive loss of lives and economic progress resulted.

What are we learning in the process?

Leadership and the ability to listen, emphasize and unite matters more than ever – without it, everything can unfold.
Heroes come in all shapes and sizes. The true heroes pulling us out of this mess are the service workers on the front-lines putting lives on the line to save their brethren (nurses, doctors, EMTs, social services, teachers, grocery store and “essential business” workers). These folks deserve every accolade, perk and quality of live improvement possible.
Globalization Revisited – it doesn’t matter if your GDP is greatest in the world if you can’t stock or make the basics to save your people (ie. PPE’s like aprons, masks, gloves, etc.)
We need to focus on the industries, tactics, practices and strategies proven to sustainably benefit the masses. Sometimes it’s time to stick in that fork and move on vs. continuing the life support.

Personally and professionally, we are all at a crossroads. Adapt or die (figuratively and literally so, sadly).

It’s a group exercise, too. One outlier can derail the recovery progress for the masses. We are all ready for the economy to return to normal – your non-distanced protests only hurt our chances to get there.

How we prepare today will impact tomorrow. It is well worth the extra few weeks of staying at home to not set ourselves back months more.

If all you have to give is goodwill and positive thoughts, pay it forward, spread it (especially while staying at home!) and the returns will multiply and help get us all back on our feet.

Closing Out 2017 with a Blockchain Bang.

2017 will go down big in the record books.

On the personal side, I took the plunge to get engaged we just closed and moved into our 1st home, a life-changing ordeal in itself. I also personally learned that a country doing everything it can to self-destruct that’s $20 trillion in debt sorely needs software to help the drastically under-equipped IRS manage operational claims to chip away at (separate post in itself).

Sponsorship Buddy is rebranding within the next few weeks to encapsulate the force it has become, now directly optimizing workflows for thousands in the brand, agency and rights holder/property space (recently including the San Francisco Giants, who I could’ve garnered multiple rings based on a different life choice made (another post of its own). With a valuation now in the 9 figure range, one could ask how I could entertain usage of my full-time hours going to something else?

The answer? The blockchain.

I also passed up an equitable opportunity with a software behemoth fast approaching IPO and an executive spot with the most elite membership and concierge program in the world involving curation of the most customized VIP global personalized experiences.

After a few weeks spent volunteering, negotiating and absorbing, I signed on to become the #2, C.O.O. & Head of Fundraising for what we believe could be the most compliant blockchain solution in the exploding ICO market. By the way, ICOs (initial coin offerings) have overtaken traditional venture capital funding means and skyrocketed to over $5 billion in funds raised for 2017.

Everyone’s now heard of Bitcoin (the Amazon of the cryptocurrency world), but most don’t understand it or the blockchain. This distributed ledger system promises to change the world by decentralizing everything, from global monetary policies to how transactions are recorded.

There are innumerable roadblocks in the way before that happens, however. Many early ICOs were launched by the likes of 19-year-old Ukrainians arming a cartel without as much as a business or legal backing. While due diligence, transparency and sound legal business principles are on the rise, there is an impending fear of the unknown, especially the SEC coming down to ban and punish those deemed outside of the legal limits. A day of reckoning is in order in today’s new age Wild West.

At OMINEX, sister-company CrowdEngine has the SEC & FINRA compliance nailed. OMINEX plans to offer a wallet to manage such security and other crypto tokens and provide the portal to launch the buttoned-up ICO, funding your dream, world-changing blockchain project.

But first, we need believers to take a chance with us and invest in the most compliant fundraising solution seen to date (while benefitting with us along the way). We could use great Advisors, referral partners and investors to help us build out the vision before we can draft the team.

It’s been quite the heroic comeback story, 2017 vs. 2016 that is.

Who’s ready to take the world by storm in compliant fashion!? Blockchain and ICOs are possibly the most world-changing phenomenon we’ve seen, can you afford to miss the boat (more about ICOs as the new gold rush – biggest wealth transfer in human history)?

Happy New Year 2018!

Lessons in Rejection

The Cleveland Cavaliers, Detroit Red Wings, Baltimore Orioles, Sporting Kansas City, Indiana Pacers, New Orleans Saints & Pelicans (among others pictured above): what do these represent? All, the latest and greatest clients of Sponsorship Buddy Inc. I, as the lead hunter, should be out celebrating in the streets to land these huge, globally embraced and recognized team brands as clients of our disruptive new platform, right? Not so fast, my friend.

Early entrepreneurial life is not glamorous (nor is the sports industry). Over the past 20 months, I’ve had to learn all kinds of new skills, competencies, and levels of resiliency and discipline. I set out with a goal of transforming the sponsorship industry in much-needed fashion for the better to help create more transparency, streamlined communications, a better client experience and improvements in quality of life. In doing so, I hoped to make my mark as an innovator, disruptor, and difference-maker and put it all on the line to do so (personal life, relationships, financial stability).

Full disclosure, it’s been the most challenging period I’ve had in life and there have been some big ones. While persistently searching out believers in my network, I’ve been aggressively pursuing careers and been so close on fantastic opportunities in sports or tech in Denver, San Francisco and here in Salt Lake City, only to be passed up on at the finish line. My closest contacts have seemingly written me off while it’s been impossible to fight off bouts of despair, depression and not feel like a failure.

One of my key strengths is my resiliency, persistence, and aversion to quitting. I thought the industry would snap up this relatively inexpensive tool but learned that it was going to take completing the marathon to change the game.

Back when we were looking for our 1st major league client after the Utah Jazz (beta customer of ours), I leaned on my former group in the Memphis Grizzlies, who have been notably innovative. In speaking with Mya Donald, activation lead for the team, I said something along the lines of, “I know this is new and daunting, but this can not only put the Grizzlies on the map as a leader in the space, but do great things for your careers.” The Grizzlies bought in, embraced the tool, and four weeks ago, Mya was on-stage as a finalist at NBA league meetings citing us as a key piece to the team’s peer-nominated Relationship Management Program of the Year. To add validation, the winners of the award, the Cleveland Cavaliers, known not only for being runner up in the 2016-2017 NBA Finals, but also for a notable Goodyear Jersey Patch Campaign and innovative 365-day activation approach have followed suit as our 5th client in the most innovative of all sports leagues (NBA).

Taking excerpts like these to market, we’ve now established ourselves as an industry-recognized brand with success stories throughout the major and minor leagues, not to mention being in the process of signing our 1st brand and agency clients. We accomplished our set growth and vesting goals a year ahead of time and have solidified our brand and platform as a force with huge upside from here while maxing out my equity shares in the company.

As we look to solve the sponsorship industry’s communication issues one client at a time, I’ve realized that I have a long ways to go to become a great communicator myself. I realized that my emails, like everyone’s texts or emails from time to time, can be misinterpreted and come off the wrong way. Instead of leaving tone, reasoning, and objectives up for interpretation, I insisted on a face-to-face meeting to speak my mind, and after a 2nd fishing trip meeting to close out the summer and further collaborate on ownership stake and employment terms. I’m now about to be in a much more secure place while being in control of day and destiny.

Lessons learned: don’t take rejection to heart. It only takes one (you). Even when everyone else loses faith in you, what you believe in and set out to do, you can accomplish anything with determination. Be mindful, self-reflective and don’t be afraid to ask for constructive feedback, advice or someone else’s time to hear you out.

Surviving on an Entrepreneurial Wild West Island.

After weeks of back-and-forth months after my consulting deal was up, we were at a crossroads of a) parting ways with only the entrepreneurial experience to show for it for b) forging a partnership, potentially lifelong. Both sides have nearly walked away at different times and everyone knew it was decision time, this was make or break and the call was going to be tense. That “Castaway” feeling of I’m alone, trying to scratch and claw my way to survival, hoping someone will venture into the vicinity and throw me a life raft can feel very real.

Doubts can be constant. Today’s social media age make peer comparisons dangerous. Why am I at point X when I’ve invested this much into myself whereas my former cohort John or Jane Doe is at point Y? Trust in others and myself with belief in the ability to turn up calculated returns is something I’ve banked on for years. But sometimes it feels like being stuck in the ocean trying to fight the current of a riptide, not going anywhere and expending energy reserves quickly.

Egocentrism is the inability to understand any perspective but one’s own. In this country, never has this come more into question than today’s political and social environment. Why should I think about someone over there when my own quality of life is in question? What happens when those relationships you’ve invested in and trusted would work out instead turn out quiet or egocentric? You’re left to your own story and ingenuity, losing hope with line after line being cast out only to be brought back with nets empty.

Despite better reason and needs to meet, we made the trip to Arizona for a wedding at a lavish venue, the JW Marriott of Tuscon pictured below. Sacrifices were made to get there – a bag of sandwiches made to avoid having to stop for food, not staying at the host resort and instead choosing a Marriott nearby. Bootstrapped startup life personalized.

JW Marriott Tuscon wedding photo — Alli & I before the wedding @JW Marriott Tuscon

After catching up with the Joneses, and being there to celebrate the big commitment day for the newlyweds, we took a day trip to the famous wild west town of Tombstone. Despite all the Hollywood takes, never was story given due justice authentically. The Boothill Graveyard was filled with stories of men that met their fates through every means from defending their honor in gunfights at the OK Corral to getting poisoned and everything in between and their stones were stolen over time by gravestone robbers looking to get their hands on valuable relics. This made me think, how does one avoid the fate of George Johnson pictured below, who was hanged by mistake? “He was right, he was wrong, but we strung him up and now he’s gone.”

In a brutal town where the odds are stacked against you like Tombstone, George may have been on to something in life. Maybe he was looking like one of the few who’s investment was going to pay off in a big way. However, his story was lost and he became known instead for his curious cause of death. George hadn’t secured himself to avoid the traps laid down all around him and succumbed to a noteworthy fate.

On the scenic way back in Navajo country (another example of a people pushed aside), we stopped at the picturesque Horseshoe Bend in the Glen Canyon area of northern Arizona (featured above). I looked out and felt like I was stuck on that rock island pushed out further and further by the sands of time, with a storm coming nonetheless.

Months after the fact and despite undue strife, my partners came through for me on my concessions and I officially tied the ownership knot. Lessons learned include not making assumptions and instead communicating better and building and executing sound social and business contracts. Don’t be afraid to be real and speak to feelings and emotions as it leads to more authentic connections. I went from fighting the riptides to grabbing a line out and back to the island. Now, it’s a matter of navigating around the hangman’s noose and traps while continuing to better equip and target those lines cast with the hope of netting that meaningful storybook foundation off the island.

Ever feel that way?

How to know who won’t leave you on an island.

We live in a social media driven world where our best Friends, Connections, Contacts, Followers and Matches are a click or two away. Because we’re so accustomed to living the “American Dream,” keeping up with the Joneses, and subjecting ourselves to the rigors that accompany these conquests, we’re content keeping up through surface-level digital footprints and sporadic, quick in-person or phone interactions. How many times per day do the, “How are things?” – “Good. You?” surface-level, efficiency-driven interactions play out? We think we know what’s going on, but all we just know what people want portrayed out there because we don’t expend the time to go deeper.

Thousands of contacts connected within a few clicks but how do we know who will come through for us when it’s on the line? Who’s willing to take the time and put in the energy themselves to go the extra mile for you when you’re in a time of need – and then actually follow through?

We’re at an ugly crossroads in America. We see it amongst all the political dissension. We see it as mental health traumas rise. We fight over resources to the point of disassociation with those closest to us. We can’t go deep ourselves, so how could we go deep for others? Are we in it for status or the good of human kind?

Sandwiched in-between two personal quests for ownership after putting it all on the line, I took a trip. Despite better financial judgement, I joined college friends south of the border for the sake of a friend who’s always had the ability to go deeper (Kaveh is pictured right with our chauffeur Carlos).

After some tropical guy’s weekend introspection, I came to some harsh realizations. I’m great at the surface level stuff, but like many guys, I have trouble talking about feelings, needs, concerns, etc. I’m too trusting that if I put it all out there for you, that you will then come through for me. I learned that I try to formulate solutions for everything and in doing so, force things when the square pegs will never fit into the round holes.

With that said, though, I learned that sometimes you need to put people on the spot to realize how much you can count on them. Sometimes, you have to lean on yourself alone.

Paying it forward with no expectations is hard to do but pays big dividends. I recently watched The Kindness Diaries on Netflix, which details one man’s quest to cross the world on a motorcycle with no money relying on the goodheartedness of others. Despite lots of doubters and strifes along the way, Leon made it and repaid those with pressing needs who helped him out handsomely with something that would help get them across the hump. That begs the question, if strangers with very little can do it, why can’t we?

What can you do to interview and determine who’s trustworthy and will come through for you? What are some strategies you’ve used to dig deep and get results during times of need?

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